The Autism ShoutOut!

I've never been much good at keeping quiet.

In school I was always losing behavior points for talking out of turn. I was always the first to lose the "quiet game", and in high school I was the theater geek with a flair for the dramatic.

Shocker, I know.

So it will come as no surprise to anyone that when I was met with the opportunity to step away from social media on November 1st to benefit Autism in what is being called the Communication Shutdown, I made the announcement to not participate.

In fact I am choosing to take the complete opposite approach to raising autism awareness by raising that which makes me strongest....my words, my heart, and my voice!

On November 1st I plan to do just that by using Twitter, Facebook, and my blog to promote autism acceptance and awareness in what I am calling the Autism ShoutOut!  In addition I plan to share with my readers a number of autism organizations that I feel have helped both myself and my family over the years.  My hope is that they may do the same for you and yours.

If you would like to join me in supporting those with autism and their families you can do so by following the tags #Autism and #AutismShoutOut on Monday, November 1st on Twitter and then re-tweeting, asking questions, or engaging others in conversation about a diagnosis that makes many different, but never less.

Autism is not scary, but today I am.

Today you are going to find me over at the supremely-awesome blog Scary Mommy sharing with you some of the perks of raising kids with autism.


Believe is or not...my life as a mother is actually easier than most in quite a few different ways thanks to The Trouble Brothers' diagnosis.

If you want to find out how you are going to have to scoot on over to The Scary Mommy Society and read all about it!

My cup runneth over

5 years, 

6 months, 

29 days, 

21 hours, 

and 15 minutes.

May seem like a long time to wait...


because it is.


But, when its the length of time between your baby boy's birth and the moment he first signs "I love you"....


You realize it was worth the wait.

Autism won't stop on November 1st & neither will I

On November 1st thousands of people across the world are donating money and pledging a communication shutdown of their social media accounts to bring attention to the autism community.

Call me crazy, but how is not speaking going to speak for the millions effected by autism who can't?

In my opinion it won't.

Do you want to know what will happen when every caretaker, parent, sister, brother, therapist, teacher, non-profit, doctor, and friend of an individual living with autism steps away from their respective Twitter, Facebook, and Blog accounts on November 1st to "show the world what its like" for those who struggle with social communication?

The world will keep on spinning, Twitter will keep tweeting, Facebook will keep posting, and millions of families raising individuals with autism will continue to advocate for their children, change their diapers, avoid restaurants and stores due to the stares and whispers of onlookers, and they will end the day thankful they made it through without a major meltdown or an elopement.

What will not happen is the millions still tweeting, facebooking and blogging will not notice their loss.  They will not call up their local autism non-profit and make a donation, volunteer to help, or ask questions.  They will do what they have always done. 

Ignore those who are silent and go on about their lives.

This is why when the autism community goes radio silence on November 1st I will still be tweeting, facebooking, and blogging about what autism really is and what it is not.  I will educate with my words, and not my silence.  I will change my boys' diapers, order in for dinner because going out is not possible, and I will be a voice for my sons until the day comes when they use their own.

Because that day may never come.

I urge my family, friends, and anyone who is not raising a child with autism or another special need to do something concrete on November 1st to make a difference in the life of a family struggling under the weight of parenting children like mine.

*Offer to watch their kids for a few hours so the mom and dad can go out to dinner in a real restaurant and enjoy a meal that didn't come to their door in a paper sack.

*Ask them to name an item they have needed for their family but have not been able to afford to buy themselves.  Then do the right thing and buy it!  I have an Amazon.com Wishlist just for this purpose.

*Instead of making a donation to an autism non-profit in their name consider writing that check to the family directly.  I assure you they need it and will be grateful!

*Go to their house and mow the lawn, shovel the walk, or rake the leaves.  These outside chores are often left undone because of the demanding job going on inside the house.

Each of us has the power to use our words, our actions, and our lives to make a difference for those living with and caring for those with autism.

Because I know all too well that on November 1st autism will not be silent....and neither will I.

Join the Special Needs Blog Hop!

All the cool moms and dads are doing it!

He screams, I scream, we all scream for God only knows why.

Noah is a screamer.

He wakes up screaming and keeps it up for the first twenty to thirty minutes every morning.

The most difficult part of the screaming is that I have no earthly idea what it is that turns my small child into a screeching banshee every morning at 5:00 a.m.  All I have are guesses and assumptions because he can't tell me what is wrong.

I try to plan ahead by having all the possible things he may need set up and ready to go in the morning.  I have the DVD on standby with a favorite show, a fresh diaper with wipes on the floor inside his bedroom door, a sippy cup of juice waiting in the fridge, and the container of frozen waffles open and ready for toasting.  The idea is that if I immediately turn on the DVD, give him his cup and waffle and then sit down to change his diaper that things will run more smoothly and prevent the screaming.

But if that were the case I would not be writing this blog post.

If the screaming was reserved only for the morning hours I could probably keep white-knuckling it and make peace with the fact that at least he doesn't do it all day.

Except he does.

The screaming, it seems, has become a form of communication for Noah.  There are specific phrases and scripts from TV shows he has memorized that make up the majority of the words he screams.  It is as if his mind places them on auto-repeat and  he can't keep his mouth from replaying them over and over again.

I know all too well that children on the severe end of the autism spectrum can have serious delays in their speech.  Sam didn't say his first 2 word combination until he was over the age of five.  At three he had only a handful of words and none of them were "Mommy".  Noah's speech is even more delayed and I have often wondered about his future and a possible need for an assisted communication device.

Most doctors and speech-language pathologists would agree that when a child is unable to express their needs they will often resort to screaming or other outbursts in frustration.  I would have to say that knowing that is of little comfort to me when I am frantically running through the house trying to figure out what it is Noah needs to calm himself down.

Thankfully, I do have some options for improving this screaming situation.  The first is to go back to using sign language with Noah when I am speaking to him.  The idea behind the use of sign language is that a child (as early as infancy) will learn words faster when they both hear and see them.  Another popular form of communication for non-verbal children is the use of small pictures called PECS (Picture Exchange Communication System).

Photo courtesy of boardmakershare.com

PECS is similar to sign language in that it gives words both a verbal and visual meaning.  PECS is commonly used in special needs classrooms and is the most popular form of communication for non-verbal adults with or without an assisted communication device.  The purpose of PECS is to give a non-verbal individual the freedom to use pictures to show a person what item they are wanting or needing. 

The only downside to PECS is that the software is quite expensive and it does require that the pictures be kept close at hand at all times.  Similarly, the assisted communication devices run hundreds to thousands of dollars and are not covered by insurance.

Clearly there are options for me to consider.  While buying an assisted communication device is out of the budget I do have the ability to use Noah's school's copy of Boardmaker Pro.  Their resource room is open to parents and for a nominal fee I can  print PECS cards, laminate them and then affix velcro stickers to create my own communication boards and schedules.

My sincere hope is that when I begin using the PECS cards with Noah he will also begin using them with me and while I am sure it will not completely eradicate the screaming I am hopeful that it will lessen it.

Perhaps this realist-Mommy has some room for optimism after all.

A scary successful Momz Share!

Saturday was our third Momz Share and it was held at the amazing home of blogging extraordinaire, Jill Smokler, also known as Scary Mommy.

Jill opened her home to over 70 influential women bloggers who noshed, networked, chatted, and cocktailed the night away.  

The awesome Momz Share team:

Jen Gerlock, Lara DiPaola, and yours truly

As always, we had great sponsors for the event.

1)  Pivs Restaurant came through with a delicious spread of food that tantalized our taste buds with awesomeness!

2)  Naughty Betty Inc. provided some hilarious coasters with witty sentiments that made us laugh out loud.

3)  Leiann of Love and Kindness was on hand providing hand massages and shared some of her scent-sational candles, lotions, and potions with each of us.

4) Jolie from Washington Family Magazine provided a cute basket full of goodies for one lucky blogging mama.

5) EllieBellieKids and Classic Play had a whole box full of glorious kiddie crowns, messenger bags, and other assorted greatness in its own wood toy box.  On a side note...dang I wanted to win that prize!

6)  Sew Cute Sweets made some of the most precious handmade pillows and party hats that were all the rage and had many of us praying to the raffle god that we would win one!

7)  Baltimore Beer Week brought out their sudsy greatness with a basket of beer, mugs, a grilling set, and 2 tickets to their upcoming event. 

8)  Amy of Social Pollen made some of the best social media cupcakes I have ever had the extreme pleasure of putting in my mouth.  She was also on hand to answer any social media or Wordpress blogging questions.

Melanie Spring of Sisarina is to thank for our amazing Momz Share website and the brilliant idea that we use Eventbrite for our current and future events.

Michael Guill of 107 Designs was our streaming video guru who had us chatting LIVE on Saturday night and also proved to be quite the dish washing machine expert when it comes to making no less than 50 dishes fit in one load.  His wife must be proud!

If you would like to check out the video re-cap for yourself you can do so by clicking here.

Other sponsors of our fall Momz Share event that were not pictured were Madeleine from La Papillon Spa who spent the better part of last week answering our many beauty questions via Twitter and will be choosing one lucky lady to win a total makeup wardrobe makeover!  Juno Baby kindly provided each lady in attendance with their adorable children's DVD titled, 'Way to go Juno!' and the code for free Juno Baby music downloads via iTunes.

The biggest shout out HAS to go to Eddie Winter of Edward J. Winter Photography who blew Jen, Jill, Lara, and I away with his amazing photos.  All of the photos in this post are his and if I wasn't already married I would re-marry my hubby just so Eddie could shoot the pics.  He is THAT amazing.

By far, the best part of the night was catching up with all my friends who live in my computer.  They make me laugh, cry, and fist bump the air with their blog posts, tweets, and words of support on a daily basis.

If you are a woman in social media and would like to join Momz Share and hang out 4 times a year with more than 125 amazing women from the Maryland, Washington D.C., and Virginia area you can find more information by visiting the Momz Share website.

Today I'm talking about the girls, my rack, the twins, my BOOBS!

This is not the first time I have blogged about my breasts.

In June I noticed some changes to one of my breasts and immediately my heart leaped into my throat and I choked on the realization that it could be cancer.

I made an appointment with my doctor and she agreed I should be seen by a specialist.  A breast surgeon whose entire practice revolves around preventing and eradicating breast cancer.

I went to my appointment fearing the worst and was pleasantly surprised when the doctor said he neither felt nor saw any evidence of cancer in my breasts.  Instead he said I had a common diagnosis of fibrocystic breast disease and recommended I cut out caffeine and follow up with him in 6 months.

I left the appointment with a calm mind and my heart back in its correct anatomical position.

Before leaving the hospital I went to visit one of my blogging friends, Sarah.  Sarah is a breast cancer survivor currently fighting a recurrence.  She was at the hospital having her weekly chemo infusion and I wanted to meet her and thank her for listening to my questions and my fears in the days leading up to my appointment.

I came home and called my blogging friend, Susan and gave her my good news.  Susan is also a cancer survivor.  She has had 3 diagnoses of cancer in 3 years.  Her first diagnosis was staggering.  Inflammatory breast cancer is one, if not, THE worst type of breast cancer a woman can fight.  The reason it is so deadly is because it typically develops without the presence of a lump.  Women will have swelling and pain of the breast and may notice strange bruising, rippling of the breast tissue similar to the surface of an orange, and/or a spreading rash.  Susan had all of the above.  Today Susan is fighting a recurrence of the IBC and is once again undergoing chemo treatments in hopes of eliminating it once and for all.

Breast cancer does not discriminate.  It does not care about your social status, whether you have a high school diploma or a PhD.  It attacks women (and men!) from all walks of life.  Every single person on this planet knows at least one person who has fought and survived or fought to their death to overcome a diagnosis of cancer.

Thankfully, today each of us has an opportunity to do something to help eradicate this disease.  First and foremost is to remember to do your monthly self-breast exam and if you notice a change in your breasts visit your doctor and get it checked out.  Then email or call your friends and remind each of them to do the same.  Another way to make a difference is by signing up for the Dr. Susan G. Love Foundation & Avon's Army of Women.  This organization is in search of one million men and women wanting to do their part to reach the goal of preventing and eradicating breast cancer.  When you sign up to be an Army of Women volunteer you will receive research opportunities that will directly effect that goal.  I encourage each of you to consider signing up today!