Old School Photo Friday

Everyone knows I love sharing old photos. All you have to do is look here, here, and maybe here, and oh yeah, here.

So when my bloggy buddy, Dumb Mom, from Parenting By Dummies, started Old School Photo Friday she had to have known that I was screaming "GAME ON!" from 40 miles away.

I recently raided my dad's extensive stash of old photos and memorabilia, which included his report cards and artwork from elementary school more than 50 years ago!  However, what I was really after were photos of my mom and my childhood that I did not already have. 

I hit the jackpot.

The photo jackpot, that is.

Whoa.  Nice socks, Sunday.  And check out my mom wearing the Colorado dress code of socks with Birkenstocks.  Seriously, we all did it.

Wouldn't you love to dig out some Old School Friday photos?  If so, please click on over to Dumb Mom's place and play along.

The ABC's of Me

I ran across a great blog yesterday from We Believe Blogs called Magically Ordinary and one of her posts was the ABC's of Me.  I decided to play along and create my own.  Afterall, imitation is the highest form of flattery.  Especially in the blogosphere!

A. Area Code:  410- The main area code for those living in the Baltimore, Maryland metro area.

B. Bed size:  King. I sleep with approx. 4 pillows and so anything smaller and my husband can't fit in the bed with me.  Plus, we have a 75 pound dog that sleeps with us.  On my side, of course.

C. Chore I hate:  Emptying the dishwasher.  I will gladly fill it each and every time but I abhor emptying it.

D. Dog or Cat?:  Dogs!  I am horribly allergic to cats and no offense to those who love them but I think they smell.

E. Essential part of my day:  My pot of coffee first thing in the morning.  I must have splenda and sugar free french vanilla creamer to go with.  I can drink it without sugar in a pinch but NEVER without the creamer.

F. Favorite Animal: Currently my favorite is the star-nosed mole.  They are so ugly they're cute.


Life: The Star-Nosed Mole - The best home videos are here

G. Gold or Silver: Silver...but I have aspirations of platinum.

H. Height:  5 feet 9 inches.

I. Instrument I play:  When I was in 5th grade I played the bass fiddle.  That only lasted a year since it was taller than I was and was a real pain in the butt to take home for practice.

J. Job:  Wanna-be domestic superhero

K. Kids:  I have 2 boys. Sam is 7 and Noah is 5 and I am also a step-mom to 2 boys, David and Mikhail, who don't live with us but visit when they can.

L. Living Arrangements:  2 bedroom, 1 bath condominium on the third floor.  Yes, our neighbors hate us.

M. Mom's Name: Frances, but she went by Fran or Franny.

N. Nickname:  With a name like mine everyone assumes its a nickname so I just go by Sunday.  However, my nieces and nephews call me Aunt Sunny.

O. Overnight Hospital Stay:  I've had a few... Tonsillectomy when I was 8.  Twice for bacterial pneumonia (age 12 and 19).  2 C-sections.

P. Pet Peeve: People who talk on cell phones in public places like a restaurant or when checking out at a store.

Q. Quote from a movie:  I have quite a few...

"Life Is Messy" -Steve Martin in Parenthood.

Bella "I'm not afraid of you."
Edward "You really shouldn't have said that."
Twilight

"If you can't say anything nice, come sit by me."  -Olympia Dukakis in Steel Magnolias

R. Righty or Lefty?:  Righty

S. Siblings:  2 sisters.  My older sister is Caryn and she blogs over at Fat-n-sassy Mama. My younger sister, is Molly who has yet to be bit by the blogging bug.

T. TV Shows:  I rarely find time to watch TV, but when I do its always something on the Discovery, Discovery Health, or History channel.  My current faves are Pawn Stars, American Pickers, and the medical shows.

U. Underwear:  Yes.  But, they are nothing spectacular, expensive, or noteworthy.

V. Vacation I am dreaming of:  Someday I AM going to travel to Fiji, Bora Bora or Tahiti and stay in one of those luxury over the water bungalows with glass floors.

W. Why I am always late:  I have children.

X. X-rays you've had:  Goodness, I have had so many I should be radioactive by now.  I was always hurting myself as a child and teen so I have had both wrists, both ankles, and 1 shoulder x-rayed.  Now as an adult I have had my knees and spine looked at by both x-ray and MRI.

Y. Yummiest food to eat:  BBQ cheddar bacon burger with leaf lettuce, tomato, and sliced onions.

Z. Zoo animals you love:  Penguins.  They always make me smile. 

Let them eat cake...

How many of you remember the stand-up routine from Bill Cosby "Himself" in which he recounts his parenting FAIL by letting his children eat chocolate cake for breakfast?

"Dad is great, he gives us chocolate cake" was sung by his children as his wife slept in one weekend morning.

They began chanting it.

"Dad is great, he gives us chocolate cake" and their elation reached a fevered pitch.

No doubt fueled by the caffeine and sugar-rich cake they had consumed their singing woke their mother who came downstairs into the kitchen and being met with 5 children and 1 husband all devouring her chocolate cake proceeded to go beserk.

I am here to tell you that sometimes it is okay to eat cake for breakfast. 

This morning our adult Sunday school class began a 10 week bible study focusing on marriage and relationships and in true Baptist-fashion every good fellowship MUST include food.  The richer and more fattening, the better!   So yesterday I made a cream cheese sour cream poundcake for the occasion. 

In retrospect I really should have taken a picture of the spread this morning.  Their were at least half a dozen baked goods, 4 egg and ham casseroles, and countless varieties of sweet rolls, croissants, and muffins.  I believe I gained 5 pounds just looking at all the food and it made me realize that apparently one of God's ways to a Baptist's heart is through their stomach. 

I had a number of requests for my recipe both from church members and on Facebook so for all of you wanting to be the hero to your spouse/ children/ bible study group/ complete stranger... this is for you.

Chanting of the song, "Sunday's great, she fed us lots of cake" is entirely optional.

Cream Cheese Sour Cream Pound Cake

Ingredients:

• 3 sticks (1 1/2 cups) butter, softened
• 1 (8 ounce) package cream cheese, softened
• 3 cups sugar
• 6 large eggs
• 3 1/4 cups all purpose flour
• 1 tsp. baking powder
• 1/2 tsp. salt
• 1/4 cup sour cream
• 2 tsp. vanilla extract

Instructions:

• Preheat oven to 325 degrees F.
•  Beat butter and cream cheese at medium speed with an electric hand or stand mixer until creamy.
• Gradually add sugar, beating at medium speed until light and fluffy.
• Add eggs, 1 at a time, beating just until the yellow yolk disappears.
• Sift together flour, salt, and baking powder 
• Add dry ingredients to butter mixture alternately with sour cream, beginning and ending with the flour mixture.
• Stir in vanilla.
• Pour batter into a well greased and floured 12-cup tube pan
• Bake at 325 degrees F for 1 hour and 30 minutes or until a tootpick inserted in the center comes out clean.
• Remove from oven and cool on a wire rack for 10 to 15 minutes before removing from the pan.
• Remove cake from pan and continue to cool on wire rack.
• Cake can be glazed  while still warm if desired, but I always serve mine plain with berries and real whipped cream.
• Enjoy the sounds of jubilant chanting of your name in praise!

Daredevil squirrels

We live in a third floor condo. 
I am afraid of heights.
I would make a very bad squirrel.

For the past few days I have noticed the squirrels in our neighborhood climbing to the tippy top of the trees just outside my balcony to feast upon the leaves in the trees. 
Sometimes they are rather precariously perched and it makes me wonder....
If I were a squirrel would I starve?

Potty Training: The Autism Edition

I once heard a quote that said, 'Potty Training a toddler is like being pecked to death by a duck'.

I would have to say that the monumental task of potty training 2 autistic children (who are certainly well past toddler-hood) is akin to stabbing yourself in the heart with a plastic spork .

Sam is 7 and wears diapers.

Noah is 5 and wears diapers.

This is the reality of raising children with autism.

Potty training is sucking the life right out of me.

And I just started.

Actually, I have tried this many many times over the past few years.

But now we have reached crisis level need for a potty intervention.

MY 5 YEAR OLD THINKS HIS PENIS IS A FIRE HOSE!

Noah is pulling his manhood up out of his diaper and literally spraying down the walls, carpet, beds, bed linens, and furniture at every possible chance.

Thankfully we own a carpet steamer but the carpet is now wet from piss or from being cleaned 18 hours out of every day.

and it STINKS.

So, all weekend long  I had my handy-dandy kitchen timer set to go off every 30 minutes to train me to put his happy butt on the potty.

It seems the only one being trained here is ME!

Out of over 25+ visits to the potty this weekend we have had roughly 8 successful pees in the potty.  We have also had approximately 6 unsuccessful whizzes on the carpet at moments when said pisser was not in my direct line of sight.

I am truly at a loss here.

I don't remember signing on for this.

I always knew potty training would be part of raising children and I accepted that.

However, today is one of those days when I hold my hands up to the sky and whisper, 'WHY?'

I'd love an answer.  From God, from you, from anyone.


And I'd also like a vacation.

Great autism resources

You can catch me over at A Child Writes today listing which autism resources I consider to be the best on the market.

Please check out ACW and consider signing your child(ren) up with a free account joining children from all over the world with pen pals.

This site is especially great for children who are on the autism spectrum or with another social difficulty.  Having a pen pal can help a shy child in expressing him/herself in a way that feels safe and less confrontational.

Going the extra mile for Team WhyMommy!

Cancer sucks.

It sucks a lot.

It sucks time, energy, and at its worst, cancer sucks the lifeblood right out of a person.

But this year I am doing my part to show the world what cancer can't suck...

HOPE!

I have signed up for the American Cancer Society's Relay for Life being held in Catonsville, Maryland on June 12, 2010.

Our team will take turns walking the track ALL.NIGHT.LONG in support of family, friends, and loved ones who have been effected by cancer.

Why in the world is the event held all night long?

Simple.

Because cancer NEVER sleeps.

And for 1 day I won't either.

This year I am walking in honor of Susan Niebur of Toddler Planet.

I am also walking in honor of my Dad as a 2 time cancer survivor and my great-grandmother (on my dad's side) who survived breast cancer.

I am looking for family, friends, and bloggy buddies to join Team WhyMommy and walk with me in support of those who are living with cancer and in memory of those who fought hard to survive but couldn't.

If you would like to join me you can click on my support button you see above or visit this link:

Team WhyMommy

 The relay is a very uplifting event with a survivor's lap that begins every relay and after darkness falls the luminaries are lit in honor of survivors and in memory of those taken too soon.  Every year I have a luminary lit in honor of my dad.  Perhaps there is someone you would like to honor or remember?

Sign up here to have a luminary lit.

If you let me know the name to be printed on your luminary I will locate it and take a photo for you on the night of the event.


The remainder of the overnight is spent with teams taking turns walking the track.  Most teams dress up according to a theme they have chosen.  As Team WhyMommy I think it would be great to have an outer space theme in honor of Susan and her work as an astrophysicist in the field of planetary science.  I would love to hear your ideas on how to really make our theme OUT OF THIS WORLD!


The teams also typically sell a product, such as coffee, snowballs, or baked goods during the event to fund raise for their Relay team.  Given I am a huge fan of baking I was thinking I would make loaves of my bread and batches of cookies.  Once again, any ideas are more than welcome!


Please consider joining Team WhyMommy or coming out in support of Susan and others living with cancer on June 12th!

Glamour Shots Gone Wild!

I stumbled upon a new blog today. Pulsipher Predilections is one funny lady who adores snuggies and will get medieval on any Starbucks employee who calls her "Ma'am".

She decided to start a one-time blog carnival inviting her readers to share their best and WORST Glamour Shots.  Considering I did them at least 4 times I have more than enough fodder for this meme!

Just feast your eyes on these tender morsels...

Age 16

Age 17

Age 19

Remember the love?

I got an email today.

From my Pastor.

He said he had missed me these past few weeks and he hoped everything was okay and that he would see me next Sunday. A quick note. Short and sweet and to the point.

In fact I believe if God sent emails they would probably sound similar. Except for one thing.

I do believe he would sign it like this:

I love you.
I've always loved you.
Even when you choose to sleep in on a Sunday morning instead of coming to see me at my house.
Even when you let the world tell you what to do instead of telling them what I can do.

I love you.

I love you right where you are.
Right there in the midst of the depression and the demons vying for your attention.
In the waves of your anxiety and the fear that binds you to it.
I love you even as you believe all those horrible lies evil is whispering in your ear.

I love you.

I love you even though you try to fix everything on your own and you forget that I want to do that for you.
I want you to let me take it.
But what I need you to do it give it to me.
And I love you even though you don't think you can right now.

I love you.

I love you as you feel torn down, weary, and you question everything around you.
I love you especially as you try to question everything about Me.
and it brings you back to who I am.
I love you when you let me mold and shape you.
and yet, I love you even when you break the vessel I have created.

I love you.
Even when it doesn't make sense.
Even when its not what you think you need.
Even when you don't feel lovable.

Those are the moments I am there.
Loving you.
Lifting you.
Molding you.

But sometimes it takes an email from your Pastor to remember.

That I love you.

Spring cleaning is in session!

I have spent the better part of 2 days doing some spring cleaning on the back end of my blog.

Hmmm, that sounds kinda dirty.

Cause it is.

But not the way you're thinking.

My sidebars are cluttered and I need to move my bloggy friend's buttons to my horizontal navigation button under "Blog Roll".  If I do not have yours and you link to me please let me know because I want to share the love!

When I changed my blog over from having a blogspot address to having its own URL at www.extremeparenthood.com and extremeparenthood.net it made my Google stats go a bit wonky.

So I spent all day yesterday setting up an account with Google Analytics as well as Google's Webmaster Tools.  I also needed to update Google with my new URL's in hopes of getting a better read out of how readers are accessing my site and who is linking to me and referring new readers.

As if doing all that and then attempting to prevent my head from exploding I am also attempting tolearn more about Search Engine Optimization (SEO) in hopes of getting my blog to show up on the front page of any search involving autism or special needs parenting.

So far I am thinking that could be a full time job in and of itself.

I would love to hear any thoughts, tip, tricks, or advice anyone may have on making this easier than it is at this moment. 

Meanwhile I am going to relax this weekend while the boys are at their Dad's house and spend some quality time here:

Taking a nice, long nap!

If it ain't broke don't fix it

I have always believed that when something works its best to let it keep working just the way it is.  This applies for so many things in life and also for the alphabet. 

Without all 26 letters in the English alphabet we would be without many of the words that make up who we are, what we believe, and even what ticks us off.  It would make it that much harder to complete our thoughts when talking to a friend, or praying to our God, or writing a complaint letter.

The following are words that are important in my life.  Ones that I would not want to replace with another.  Words that are powerful just where they are, just as they are.

A  Autism- because "developmentally disabled" is too vague.

B  Boys- because "little man" sounds too grown up.

C  Cancer-  because I want to use its true name when I shake my fist and curse it for hurting those I love.

D  Daddy- because every little girl has a "Father".  But a lucky few are blessed with a Daddy.

E  Evil-  because some people and things are best described as such.

F  Forgiveness-  because without it we're all just walking around in circles trying to forget.

G  Grace-  because without it I'd fall short in the eyes of God.

H  Humble- because I truly cannot think of another word to describe someone with this trait.  Can you?

I  Idiot-  because otherwise the guy in the village is just "weird".

J  Jesus-  because sometimes "Lord" and "Savior" sound so proper and Jesus wants us to come to him just as we are and accept Him just as He is.

K  Kiss-  because the preacher telling the groom he can now "Smooch his bride" sounds stupid.

L  Love-  Because saying "I like you a lot" is lame.

M  Mommy- Because no matter if you are 6 or 106 when you're hurting and the world is crashing down its the first person we all cry out for. 

N  No-  Because sometimes short and sweet is the best strategy.

O  Oklahoma-  Because otherwise they may have tried to get away with naming my home state North Texas.  And that would be just WRONG.

P  Please-  Because this word makes everything sounds nicer.

Q  Quiet-  Because otherwise librarians would have to tell you to "cease speaking" and that sounds too librarian-ish.

R  Reflect-  Because if we don't take the time to do this we will just keep doing the same stupid stuff over and over again.

S  Stop-  because a sign at an 4-way intersection that says, "Slow Down" really wouldn't be adequate.

T  Truth-  because a kid saying he is telling me a  "non-lie" sounds mischievous and questionable.

U  Unique-  because telling everyone its good to be "different" doesn't sound nearly as special as it really is.

V  Vacation-  because "trip" sounds so boring and any place with a swim-up bar is so much more than that.

W  Whatever-  because never before has a seemingly insignificant word held more emotion and frustration.

X  Xylophone-  because this is one of the first words Sam ever said and thus began his love of music.

Y  Yes-  because "maybe", "we'll see" and "uh-huh" just pisses people off.

Z  Zoo-  because this word adequately describes my home and the craziness that ensues therein.

This writing exercise has been a part of Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop.  Just click the poodle-perfect button below to visit other bloggers who have joined in on the fun!

The TEAM WHYMOMMY Science Fair!

Today a fellow bloggy buddy of mine, Susan, of Toddler Planet  is undergoing surgery.

She and her many supporters (AKA:  Team WhyMommy) had hoped and prayed that the Inflammatory Breast Cancer (IBC) she had fought and survived two years ago would never return.

Sadly, it has.

Despite a double mastectomy and numerous rounds of chemo and radiation the cancer has recurred for a second round in her lymph nodes.

But Susan's fight with cancer does not define her.

Not even close.

What does define Susan is her life as an amazing wife and devoted mother to 2 small boys and her work as an astrophysicist in the field of planetary science.

Today Team WhyMommy is once again supporting Susan by dedicating our blogs to science.  We are having our very own virtual science fair!

Namely...helping to instill a love of science in our children in honor of Susan and all she has done to make science fun for her own children and us. 

When I was trying to think of a science experiment I could do with my boys I kept drawing a blank.  Clearly the exploding lava volcano model was out for many reasons including my desire to not ruin the carpet or their clothing.  In an attempt to promote safety I knew we would not be making a trek into nature to discuss what snake are venomous vs. non-venomous.  I also was not up for attempting to dissect a frog or worm given I had done both in middle school and had the mental scars to prove it.

Then it hit me.

What is the one thing all children love?  WATER!

So, without further ado, I bring you...

TEAM BANSHEE'S 

SINK OR FLOAT EXPERIMENT!

The boys were instantly on board with the experiment when they saw Mommy carrying the giant bucket of water!

Introducing our test subjects!

Note the brave astronaut who joined the experiment!

In true scientist fashion I made a list of the test subjects and the first column was for our hypothesis of if the item would sink or float and the last column being for what the item actually did.

Surprising both the boys and myself was the fact that our astronaut friend floated instead of sinking like a rock.

S

Sadly said astronaut may have preferred to sink rather than become a chew toy for Noah.
Sometimes science does suck!

The boys both loved the experiment and I have to say that it went 150% better than I could have hoped.
Perhaps it is their grandfather's nuclear physicist genes taking root!

 Most surprising to me was the fact that a rubber band sinks instead of floating.  Seriously?  Who would have thought that sucker would sink like the Titanic?

This science experiment was a complete success.  The boys loved it, I learned something new about rubber bands, and the house survived completely unscathed.  

**********************************

On a serious note, if you are the praying sort, I would humbly ask that you say a few for my dear friend Susan that her surgery today is successful, all the nodes can be safely and completely removed, and that she will not require additional chemotherapy. 

Any prayers that cancer is completely eradicated from the face of the earth and that all the women, men, children, and families affected by it are left free to love deeply and grow old hand in hand all the days of their lives is completely optional.

And yet, desperately needed.

Camp Stimey & Camp Banshee combine forces

Stimey and her boys made the trek north of Baltimore to meet my boys and I at a local playground for a continuation of Camp Stimey Spring Break Sensory & Social Skills Special Session and my most humble Camp Banshee where unlike Camp Stimey's awesome Peep Diorama and day-trips inside the mouth of Poseidon we spend most of our time screaming wildly and gnashing our teeth.

Okay, maybe that's just me.

Stimey and I both came prepared with numerous snacks, juice boxes, bubbles, sidewalk chalk, and magnifying glasses which everyone will be glad to know were NOT used to teach our sons how to set ants on fire. In fact, we were all having so much fun chasing our mutual children and attempting to keep them from running wildly away into another zip code chatting and relaxing on a park bench that we never had a chance to do any science experiments.

 Remember the sappy scene from Jerry Maguire where Renee Zellweger says, "You had me at hello"?

Well, Stimey had Noah when she said, "Bubbles"

T

 Then Noah found the sand pit and all was right in the world.

S

Sam continued to entertain with his various musical abilities using a stick and the playground equipment

Every A+ playground has 1 very important thing in common:
The super-duper-tall-Mommy-frightening Slide!

J

Jack and Noah were perfectly suited for one another with their mutual love of all things sensory including:  sand, bubbles, and twisty slides.

S

Sam watched some peers climbing this jungle gym and followed suit but thankfully did not attempt to slide down the firemen's pole in the center.
Something tells me that may take just a bit more motor planning than he is ready for.

I would have to say that our combination Stimey/ Banshee Camp was a roaring success and I am certainly looking forward to the next adventure that awaits our brood.

Sunday has left the building!

Hello everyone, I am Dumb Mom (yes, THE Dumb Mom), and I’m here representing the bestes blog eva parenting BY dummies.

I have been an active member of the blogging community since December, 2008, which means I am coming up on my 18 month blog-a-versary.

I have experienced some success with my blog (you know stuff that matters like followers, traffic, comments, Google page rank), but nothing to really write home about (not that I have to since my mother stalks my blog shamelessly).

But, I haven’t gotten to the point where I feel accomplished or truly successful as a blogger (aka the point at which the money begins to roll in).

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t live in Crazy Blogger Delisuionalville so I know that I’m not likely to be the next Dooce (no PPD ravings here) or the next Pioneer Woman (no sexy cowboy hubby either), but you know, I kinda would like to be a respected member of the blogging community.

And, I’m sorta sick of waiting for my content to make it happen for me.

Plus, I don’t know anybody (‘cause you know, blogging, like real life, is a lot about who you know), at least not anybody who likes me wants to let me ride their coattails to the top support my “brand”.

So I came up with a new plan.

A plan to ensure blog-world domination in as little as 6 weeks.

A genius plan really.

To eliminate to competition and make people like me catapult me to the top.

Buying blogs!

That’s right people, B-U-Y-I-N-G them.

I figured that one of the main obstacles standing in the way of my become-a-popular-blogger-so-people-will-pay-me plan is that the market is becoming a bit saturated.

It’s getting too hard to have a blog.

Now you have to worry about annoyingly time consuming junk like personal branding, SEO, building a blog community, and other stuff I’ll let you know about when I figure out what it is.

And.  You need a niche.

A niche that is supported by good content.

I don’t have a niche (unless you call being a suckit mom who is strangely funny a niche), or time to think about my brand, or brains to master SEO.

So, I’m taking the easy way out…MONEY.

It may not be able to buy you love (which I’m not sure I agree with) but it can buy you blogs, because everyone needs it and most of us like it (which is more than I can say for my blog).

So the other night when I sat down to do my figuring, I figured that what I need to do is get some cash, find some in-the-market-for-some-cash bloggers, and give it to them to to go away let me be the creative director on their sites.

Basically they post about me and me related material and all is well.

And, guess what?!

It worked!

I’ve turned 12 of them so far!

So instead of reading about Mama B’s peanut butter life, or Angie’s Seven Clowns, or Jen’s Hipness, or KMama’s Daily Dribbles, or Marf Mom’s Marfan, or When SHE became her mom, or Being a former Fatty, or how HER Life Gone Awry, or Amy’s B Hole, or Supah’s Adventures, or Faemom’s Faeness?, or even Sunday’s Extreme Parenthood, you get to read about moi.

Before they sign off for good for the duration of their written-in-blood contracts they have each written one last post for you here: parenting BY dummies.

I urge you to give them a chance to explain why they’ve sold you out to The Man (The Man being ME) succumbed to the Dumb.

Come on over and say adios to your beloved bloggers.  MWAHAHAHA!!!

P.S. I am currently not on the hunt for other blogs to dominate as I have run into a bit of an issue with my blog-world-domination budget plan.  #therecessionisruiningeverything!